Zane's 10th Birthday Week: Happy Birthday Zane

Dear Zane,

Today was the day. You officially entered double digit land. Today we woke up with the hopes of a better day than yesterday. Yesterday you and I fought like cats and dogs. I maintain that you cannot physically hurt your brother, even if he annoys you. Meanwhile, you are having a very hard time learning this lesson, and you're not making good choices, and so our day yesterday was less than fun. I hated it, you hated it, we all cried, and I ended the day praying to the good Lord above that today be a better today.

You woke up early, because my sweet son, you have ALWAYS woken up early. You came into our room at 6:30 a.m., but we both know you had probably been up for at least an hour before that. You opened presents before Daddy had to go to work. You got your big present, a new bike, a month ago so you could actually ride it before it was one hundred degrees everyday. So this morning you got books, a Harry Potter Lego, Chinese checkers, a new puzzle, water balloons, and a new swimming suit. We sat outside enjoying the morning, playing Chinese checkers, before the rains came in.

Last week I found the plastic container that I had put your first birthday sign in. The sign and these little pin wheel place card holders were in there, having been moved to all the various different places we have lived in the last nine years. I don't know why I kept it, beyond the fact that I had spent so much time making it and that was such a wonderful day, I just couldn't part with it. How did I have so much time to cut out each triangle and letter? Why did I do that when I could easily have just bought a birthday banner? Because you, Zane, were my first baby. You're birthday parties have always been over the top. They've been planned for weeks in advance, the decorations have always been out of control, the cakes have always been amazing, the themes unique. You have always seemed to get just a little more celebration. It's not right, but it seems to hold true all these years later.

So this morning, on your tenth birthday, you set under that same banner, looking half grown and it just hit me in the gut that your time here with me, at home is more than half over. These past ten years have gone by so quickly, in another ten, God willing, you'll be out on your own. Learning new things, living your live, my job in raising you will be done. This was the start of my very emotional morning.

I put a picture from each of your birthdays on the pinwheel place card holders, a walk down memory lane from all your amazing birthday celebrations. Just to recap they went as followed;

1. BBQ birthday
2. Train Birthday
3. Spiderman Birthday
4. Ninja Turtle Birthday
5. Hawaiian Penguin Birthday (my personal favorite)
6.  Harry Potter Birthday( epic, amazing, never to be topped)
7. Baseball Birthday
8. Mario Cart (two weeks post op, it's the best we could do)
9. America Birthday 
10. Fiesta Snake Birthday - Another amazingly unique theme only you could come up with

Then the rain moved in, adding to my emotional morning. Grandpa Blakley hugs are given in the form of rain now, and this rainy day felt like a giant hug. You went and played in, as we all said hi to Grandpa. I remember the morning of your first birthday it poured rain, for just a little bit, then it was a gorgeous summer day. He always shows up and today he showed up big time. Today ended up being a rainy, almost chilly day, all day. That's a first for you. Usually your birthdays are sunny, hot, affairs with swimming and water balloon fights, but not today.

Today we had a lazy day inside preparing for your party. We watched some Harry Potter, since you just finished the fourth book yesterday, after setting a goal to finish it before you turned ten. You helped me decorate your snake cake. I still can't believe that it took ten years for you to finally land on a snake theme, but I think the cake turned out amazing. You got out one of your many snake books so we had a picture to go by when sculpting the head and tail out of rice krispy treats, which was a first in my baking career. You were in charge of decorating the top and our inspiration was a Western Diamondback rattle snake, complete with a rattle on his tail, a triangular head, and vertical eyes.

 It was a lazy, gloomy afternoon. Dad came home from work around lunch and this evening the whole family came over to celebrate. Yes, we're still in the middle of a global pandemic. No, the numbers in Oklahoma are not looking good. Should we all have gotten together for this celebration? That's debatable, but we did and I'm so glad. I've desperately missed these family celebrations over the past few months. A birthday just doesn't feel like a birthday without all the cousins running around. It was definitely loud, since we all had to be inside, but it was wonderful to have everyone here to celebrate with us.

 Able hooked you up with a zip up Mexican Wedding shirt and the Blakley family came correct in their Fiesta apparel. 

 You and your little buddy baby Worth.

 You can't have a fiesta without a pinata, shaped like a taco of course.

 These two little blonde babies just about stole your thunder with their cuteness.

  Officially in double digits.

 All the cousins!

 We had a great time celebrating you. You got a badmitten net and rackets, a handful of new cookbooks, all sorts of baking goodies from Grandma, a kickball, pringles, and all sorts of other fun stuff. You got to play with your cousins and everyone had a wonderful time.

We ended the evening exhausted after a long week of staying up late and celebrating all day. You remain my cuddliest baby, but you're as big as I am now. Daddy caught our attempt at a cuddle before bed, as I recounted how sick I was at this point ten years ago, trying not to throw up on your cute newborn face.

Ten years later

So you've made it. You've survived a decade of life. You are living on borrowed time and you know it. You don't waste one second of this life. You've been through so many battles and you have the scars to prove it. You've been through more in this first decade than most go through in a life time. This has made you braver than most. You are strong and kind, with a very tender heart. You love your people well and even though you're almost as big as I am you still need hugs from your Mamma from time to time. 

The past few months has been extremely difficult for you and I hate that you are so keenly aware of the fear of death. I hate that that continues to be part of your story, but it is and we've tried to keep you save during this uncertain time.  I know that hasn't been fun. You're turning ten in one of the strangest, scariest times in history. The world seems like it's falling apart around us. We have no idea what tomorrow, let alone the next year holds in store for us. So my prayers for you sweet boy, on your tenth birthday, are that the Lord surround you with His strength, love, and protection and keeps you safe. May we all be here again next year, in our silly costumes and hats, celebrating another miraculous year with you here. May your fears of the world around us ease up a little. I pray that you can at some point feel safe doing so many things that bring you joy, that we can't do currently, like going to the movies, going to see the Cardinals play, having friends over at our house, going to school, all the things that were so mundane a year ago seem almost out of reach right now. I pray that changes this year. I pray that you continue to love deeply and continue to choose good, kind friends. Lastly, I pray that somehow, someway, this year you can find it in your heart to figure out how to get along with your brothers so we can stop fighting that battle.

I love you sweet boy. You made me a mother and you're one of the three best things to ever happen to me. I'm so proud of you. I know you are going to do great things with this life you've been given. I can't wait to see what it is. I love you so very much.

Happy Birthday!

Love,

Mom

Zane's 10th Birthday Week: Ten Things About Zane at Ten

It is crazy how much of Zane's personality now is so similar to when he was little bitty. It's so true that people are just born who they are going to be and no two kids are alike. So here are ten fun facts and favorite things of Zane's as we celebrate his big day.








1. Zane has always been, and remains, a born leader. When Zane was a toddler, when he could walk onto a playground get everyone there to play with him. Now he can walk into a group of kids, of any age, and get them all involved in an activity. The best part of this particular super power is that he does this with kindness. He always tries to make sure everyone in the group is included, they may not always want to be, but Zane will always invite them. The downside of this super power is that Zane sets the tone/energy level of any group he is in, specifically his brothers. If Zane is well behaved and calm, so goes the crowd. If Zane is insane, loud, and misbehaving, so goes the crowd. Recently I started referring to this talent as his super power, that he needs to use wisely and for the good. I hope he can figure out how to do that and continue to use it to include everyone around him in the fun he's creating.






2. This ties in with the first one, but Zane is an extreme extrovert. He requires human contact. He gets depressed if he isn't able to talk to you be around other people for any amount of time. He's like his father in this way, so quarantine was tough for this one. I always knew he was a leader and a people person, but I didn't fully understand just how much he truly craved human interaction until that was the one thing he could not have during lockdown. We found ways to work around this, using video calls and chats, but it just wasn't the same. He needs the hugs, the high fives, and being in the same space as people he loves. He recently got to see his best friend in the neighborhood for the first time in three months, and it was just about the sweetest thing you've ever seen.








3. Zane is tender hearted and loves hard. Again, he's always been this way. He has always loved so hard, everyone he meets, and until the world wouldn't allow it he would hug any and everyone. He comes to people with an open heart and thankfully the world hasn't broken it yet. He's been blessed with amazing friendships, teachers, and mentors that have loved him so well and I've so enjoyed watching him allow people into his life. I admire this about him. I know that at some point loving this hard will lead to a heartache, but it will be so worth it in the end. He's a kind soul. When he talks about how he choses his friends he talks about wanting to be friends with people who are kind, who aren't mean to other people, who are inclusive, and who don't want to always talk about fighting, football or video games. He's a great judge of character and has chosen to surround himself with the best type of friends. I speak from personal experience when I say this isn't always an easy thing to do.



4. Zane loves to cook! Full stop Zane is a little chef in the making. This was also true when he was little. He would request to bake cookies or help me make dinner from when he was just a little guy and he's never stopped. He loves the raddish kits he gets each month with new recipes and as through our extended time at home has been able to expand what he knows how to make. He doesn't shy away from any recipe, except if it involves long periods of chilling something. Zane wasn't blessed with great patience, but otherwise he's here for it. He has helped me make all sorts of dinners, every kind of dessert imaginable, various breads, and everything in between. He claims he wants to open a restaurant when he grows up and be a chef. I think he'd be great at it.

Zane has gotten a lot of use out his new apron that his Grammie sent him during quarantine.

 Zane made my birthday cake this year.



5. Zane's other great love is baseball. There for a while during quarantine we thought we weren't going to be able to play at all this spring/summer which lead him to not want to practice much at home. I think he was sad at the idea of not playing an actual game for a long time. But now that he's back on the field, playing games, getting big hits, and getting to pitch he's right back in the swing of things. He's grown to be quite the little pitcher and of course still brings a very big bat up to the plate.

 

6. Zane has become quite the history buff. His preferred book of choice is a non-fiction book about a historical figure. Really he would read non-fiction all the time if I let him. He enjoys learning about American History, World History, inventors, activists, scientist, you name it. I can not imagine reading a book on Ghandi as a 4th grader, but to each his own I guess. He's learned a lot and hopefully this serves him well in school at some point.






7. Of course Zane still loves all things nature, which again has been the case since he was a little tiny boy. He loves to learn about any and all animals, with his favorites remaining penguins and snakes. He has a vast knowledge of all things reptiles, which I'm not really sure he needs, but he enjoys it. He still loves catching turtles, frogs, fish, snakes, and recently tarantulas.

all the fish

tiny turtle rescue





8. Zane is also my artsy child. This year he has started to really enjoy/work on learning how to draw. This was something else we were able to work on during quarantine. He watched a lot of how to draw YouTube videos and has learned a lot of fun things. He drew a lot of cards for nurses and healthcare workers while we were stuck at home. This year he won his first art contest with a drawing that he made for the healthcare workers at Oklahoma Heart Hospital. He won a membership to the Oklahoma Science Museum, which who knows if we will ever be able to use, but he was very proud of himself. I love how his artistic mind works. He no longer wants any sort of help or guidance when he's doing an art project. He has his own vision.

Zane took to drawing in all sorts of different places. Quarantine definitely helped stretch our imaginations a lot.

 Here's his winning drawing. I love it!

9. Here's the challenge with Zane. Zane deals with all his difficult emotions through anger/rage. Rowan, deals with all emotions through falling into a puddle and crying. These are things you learn about your children really early on and that's true for Zane. Zane wants to scream, kick, and flail around on the floor sometimes now, just like he did when he was a toddler. It's much less cute now and much harder to handle. We've worked A LOT using words to describe what we're feeling, not just screaming or running away and slamming the door. All of this was put in a pressure cooker when the world turned upside down. We had to work on this a lot and we worked on ways to prevent getting into these situations. As I mentioned early those around Zane will meet him where ever he is emotionally. So if he's happy go lucky, playing, having the time of his life so goes the rest of our family. If Zane is losing his mind, angry, screaming, having a meltdown over nothing, so goes the rest of the family, myself included. This means needing alone time even when it's the last thing he wants. This means I need alone time, even when that isn't necessarily possible. I see this being a challenge for us for years to come. But we're working on. Lord help us!

10. Lastly, Zane still thoroughly loves all things Harry Potter and he'd be upset if I didn't mention that. He started a Harry Potter Club at school this year, which was basically him and two other girls who really like Harry Potter who met at each other's houses a couple times to do Harry Potter things. They also got to go see two of the movies in the theatre before movie theatres were shut down. He is currently almost done with Harry Potter and The Goblet of Fire which he had put off reading all year because he wanted to read it on summer break. I'm proud of him for sticking with it. He still doesn't love to read, but has gotten into a few books this year so at least it's not a constant battle to get him to keep reading.



That's a glimpse of Zane at ten. I can't believe how quickly this past decade has gone. I can't wrap my brain around all this sweet boy has been through in the first ten years of his life. 



Zane's 10th Birthday Week: A Year In Pictures

Ten years old! I cannot believe it. Here's a look back on the 10th year of Zane's life.

June 2019

Last game of the season last spring. This year we're just now starting. There are going to be some hot ballgames this summer.  

 Night before his birthday last year.

9 Years of being awesome

Wild hair

July 2019

Last time at swim lessons.

 Fourth of July

 Seeing his beloved St. Louis Zoo penguins last summer was a highlight of the year for sure.

Our tour of Busch field was also a big highlight of this year.

Looking through these pictures it's crazy to think how different this summer is going to look from last summer. Last year we had field trips to random places at least a couple times a week. This year we're going nowhere. I miss those days and I'm kind of scared we may never return back to them.

August 2019

Zane and Worth have been best buds since the very beginning.

 In August Zane finally got to see Hamilton, this was definitely a top moment of his 10th year.

 First day of third grade. This was a strange year to say the least. 

 Another first for the 10th year, a trip to the ER for a C-collar. That was tons of fun.

September 2019

Selling popcorn in a neck brace with your brother who has a broken arm has to win you some sort of prize.

  Zane won his first cooking competition this year with his Harry Potter Savory Hand Pies.

 Cardinals went to the post season for the first time in a few years. It didn't end like we had hoped but it was lots of fun to experience with the boys.

 Game ball for pitching a great game. Last year was the first year Zane started pitching and he's done a wonderful job, working hard, and showing great improvement as the year went on.

October 2019

 Heart birthday cake

 Zane and his BFF trick or treating

November 2019

Zane was a Bear Scout this year. Last year in the blue uniforms.

Ready for Statehood Day

December 2019
Zane was in Christmas choir this year and was excited to be get to do spring choir this year as well. Sadly, spring choir was cancelled along with everything else once COVID hit.

 First broken window at Zane's hand.

 Zane is almost as tall as I am now, but still arguably my cuddliest child.

 This was the last Christmas Zane didn't know the truth about Santa. I'm glad it lasted this long, but sad to think of this magical phase ending for him.

January 2020

 Zane and his mini me, T.

 Zane had the flu twice this year, sick for a solid week in December and January, we were locked down at home, missing all the activities, before COVID even started.

 Zane and I had lots of fun going to the Oklahoma history museum with his school.

 Zane won the Best Driver category of the Pinewood Derby this year with his canoe full of Harry Potter characters.



February 2020

 Last  year for kids heart challenge

Zane had so much fun doing his living history project on Jim Henson. He learned a lot and did a great job. I was incredibly sick all of February and this was my first time out of the house in a month. I had no voice and felt like I might die, but I was there to see him give his speech.

March 2020

The Blue and Gold banquet was the last thing we did out in society, as a family, before the COVID-19 shut down. This was the last time Zane would be wearing the Cub Scout blue uniforms.

Spring break was the start of our quarantining at home. This bike ride below was when I received the email that they wouldn't be going back to school for at least two more weeks. This was the start of our two and half months at home, not seeing any family, or friends.

Zane's love of baking and cooking really took off during quarantine. We baked almost everyday for the first month or so then had to try to cut back some as we continually were eating cakes/cookies.

Zane probably had the hardest time with quarantine since he knew he was a vulnerable population, which brought on all sorts of anxiety and fear, as well he is an extreme extrovert and desperately missed his friends and teachers at school.

April 2020

There are probably twenty pictures of Zane cooking or baking in the month of April. He baked cakes, cookies, pretzels, brownies, caramel and chocolate popcorn, you name it. We also had cooking challenges where he made entire meals, pork tenderloin, chicken strips, hamburgers, and all the sides. It was loads of fun and I think he learned a lot. 

 During quarantine morning exercise time became part of our daily routine. Zane has cried during probably 90% of the exercise times since March. It doesn't matter if it's yoga and we're just stretching or if we're riding bikes, it always ends in tears. With that being said he usually says he enjoys it by  the end and he is definitely getting faster and stronger.

 This Nailed It challenge he did, virtually, with his best friend was one of the coolest things we did during quarantine. It turned out so cute and they had so much fun doing it together.

  Doing schoolwork in your pajamas, while eating handfuls of Easter candy isn't all that bad.

 Zane graduated to the 24inch bike with gears in April. I'm not sure he loves it. He frequently gets off and is walking his bike which makes he think he is using the gears wrong. 

May 2020

First trip out of the house in a month an half to go to the lake. Can you tell that Zane was excited?

 Good bye parade for Mrs. Gipson

 Last day of virtual third grade. I hate all the things that Zane missed at the end of the year. He was so sad with how it ended. On to a new school next year, who knows what that will even look like at this point.

 Zane with Willie the turtle after we had a successful hook removal surgery.

 My little nature lover on a morning hike.

 Zane made a red velvet cake for his two year heart birthday this year.

June 2020

We sat out the first two weeks of baseball, but Zane is finally back at it, getting the game ball for his game where he was so close to hitting a home run.

 Ten years later and this kid still loves snake hunting and all things nature, apparently including tarantulas.

 We're skink sitting Uncle Brent's school skink this summer which has been interesting.

 Two years since his valve replacement and doing great.