Thatcher's 5 Month Update

Oh my how my sweet baby T is getting big. We've had lots of changes this month and things continue to speed ahead too quickly. This month he started working on crawling quite intensely. His workout routine has gotten much more serious over the past week or so when he has learned how to get up on all fours, mastering the baby rock, and if that wasn't enough he also has mastered the baby plank. I don't remember the other boys planking so hard, but Thatcher has spent the past few days doing it continually. He is definitely mobile, while be it very slow, at this point. I'm sure he'll be crawling around like crazy in a month. He currently is in the, get up on his knees, face plant his way across the room phase. In more developmentally appropriate news he is also working on sitting up and has almost mastered that as well. In my book you should sit up before you crawl, but he doesn't seem too concerned about it. Thatcher is still a little wobbly when he's sitting so I don't leave him alone, but he does enjoy it. I enjoy when he gets tired and slowly falls forward onto his face, hysterical. (I'm cruel, I know). He has also turned from his belly to his back a few times, but doesn't have much use for that since he's busy learning to crawl.





Oh did I mention he has found his tongue and he finds it very amusing.







He remains on the growth path of his biggest brother Zane. This week I finally found him some twelve month pajamas. I couldn't find them because they are with the clothes Rowan wore when he was literally one. Some of the pjs I got out for T yesterday are pajamas Rowan was wearing when he was walking. My concern that Thatcher is going to lap Rowan is real. The shorts Rowan is currently wearing I'm pretty sure Thatcher will need next summer. Somehow the clothes sharing just doesn't seem to work out with my boys. I haven't actually weighed him recently, but he's heavy and big, and has the cutest chubby little thighs imaginable.



Other developments this month include his growing out of some of his tiny baby habits. Until a week or so ago Thatcher loved to be swaddled and needed to stay that way in order to stay asleep. This is not the case anymore and it was a drastic change in opinion that happened over night. One night he was swaddled in a tight little cocoon and the next night he screamed bloody murder until we let his arms out. He also, as of late, has no use for his binki. He never loved it like Zane and Rowan, but would take it when he was falling asleep. About the same time he decided he hated swaddles he decided he hated his pacifier as well. I find myself still putting a binki clip on him, out of habit from the other boys more than anything, but he pretty well refuses to take it. More power to him, makes my life easier, if I could just remember he doesn't need it. He does still love his muslin blankets, he rubs his little face with them and falls right to sleep. Luckily for me I have a bazillion of them so if he throws up or drools all over them there are plenty backups.

 Look at those blue eyes and that big old grin. I just adore his little face.

 In truly amazing, but sometimes truly sad news, my sweet boy is an amazing sleeper. He puts himself to sleep, easily, and all alone, in his bed for naps and at bedtime. He talks the most right before he goes to sleep, just a constant stream of noise, until he's finally asleep. There is lots of eye rubbing and blanket cuddling in there too, but no mommy cuddles, no rocking, no songs. Cue my tears, but it is really amazing. We've mastered parenting to the point that all my favorite things have become obsolete. Thatcher still is sleeping through the night with the occasional waking up because he's rolled onto his stomach, but he goes back to sleep by himself. We have had to go flip him over occasionally, but nothing like the craziness of my other children. He had one night of craziness, that lasted maybe on hour, the other day and Zach and I were wrecked the next day. How did we ever survive the other two's infanthood??





Other firsts this month included his first tiny baby cold, which delayed his start of childcare for a few days. However, as soon as he started daycare he just caught another cold/snotty nose situation so not sure why we kept him home. He has weathered both amazingly well and without ear infections (knock on wood) which is a great sign. He even slept fairly well through all of his stuffiness. He started eating some solids this month and did great with it. He eats like a champ and doesn't even make a huge mess. He can sit up in the big kid stroller now and we've had to move the straps on his car seat up to the last notch already. I wonder where our next size up car seat has gone? This month Zane started school so his days at home aren't quite as wild, but he still gets lots of big brother cuddles in the morning and evening. Zane and Rowan both are pretty sure he's a toy and love "playing" with him when he's rolling around on the floor. I'm dreading him crawling on many levels, but my biggest concern is his brother's stepping on him. So far he tolerates all the "love" quite well.



These three boys are my favorite!





Ten on Tuesday.... on Wednesday

1. Ok first grade update, we are almost two weeks in and things are going well. We went to information night and first grade seems very intense. There is a lot to learn and since we live in the state with the poorest funded education that comes with conversations about not being able to afford reading books or math worksheets. It's extremely disheartening especially since we live in one of the best school districts in this terrible state. I can't imagine the kids in the OKC school district. In great news we have managed to move the bus stop to right in front of our house and have convinced the neighborhood boys to come play in our driveway while they wait.



2.  Last weekend was the start of Sunday school. This marked Rowan's first year in Sunday school, in Ms Maggie's class. He has been so excited about it and it did not disappoint. Look at the outfit he picked out for the occasion.

 Added bonus, Rowan's BFF Everett is in his class too. They had a great time!

3. Also last weekend we went to Westfest on Western Ave, by the spice shop. Zane's wildest dreams finally came true, holding a python. He handled it like a champion and was so excited to tell everyone about it.

The also got some Batman ice cream, just like we use to get in our old St. Louis neighborhood.

 

4. This weekend was finally the big day, Rowan's first baseball practice. He was placed on the Cubbies, yes our St. Louis Cardinal obsessed family now has a little Cub to cheer for, we are handling it alright. Rowan could not be more excited about playing baseball. He's been going to Zane's practices, twice a week, all summer. He can hit, he can throw, he can catch, he's going to do amazing.  

 

Here he is, after picking out his brand new cleats. We braved a torrential down pour to get all his new baseball stuff.



  And here he is before his first practice. I hear he did amazing. I love how much he loves it.

5. The start of school also means the start of Cub Scout popcorn sales. They started Friday and Zane has already sold almost three hundred dollars worth of popcorn. He has hit up all the houses close to our house and most of his Aunts and Uncles. He is quite the little salesmen and he's already met most of our neighbors through his lemonade stand. I hope my  neighbors don't mind his salesmanship. So far they have been very supportive. This part of his personality must come from his father because I would rather die and slow and painful death than sell things door to door. If you want some Cub Scout popcorn let me know!

6. Baby T is getting huge and working unnecessarily hard on crawling. He is doing the full fledged baby rock, up on his knees, throwing himself forward, face planting his way across the floor.

Here is Thatcher's planking yesterday, he's oh so close to crawling, no Bueno.



7. Thatcher also is not a fan of being cuddled to sleep. This is devastating to me. It's very convenient and wonderful the majority of the time, but there are moments (such as during church when I desperately want to hold a sleeping baby on my shoulder) when it breaks my heart. After church on Sunday, after he fell asleep in his car seat not when I was holding him, he fell asleep on the floor at home. So I cuddled him once he was asleep, that will show him. Isn't he a darling. 

8. I spend a lot of time saying "Thatcher is a person not a toy!" This morning there were some epic brother cuddles in Thatcher's gym. They got him pillows and blankets and even ended up making him a tiny baby fort.

 

And here they are after school yesterday, pretty sure that's pure fear in poor baby T's face. He might be loved right to death.

9. This morning Thatcher took his first walk sitting up like a big boy in the stroller. He also wore some wind pants because it was almost chilly, hooray!! Look at how adorable his fat little legs are now! He fell asleep immediately and it was amazing. 

 

 10. Now that school has started again I'm trying to get Rowan motivated to do some learning this year as well. I am slightly terrified by the fact that I have one less year to get Rowan ready for kindergarten. Zane definitely needed the extra year, and he thrived, so I'm terrified that Rowan won't be as prepared. I've given in and found some learning apps on the tablets that he enjoys and actually will do. Here he is with Thatcher, working on writing his letters, while baby T works on sitting up.

 



 

Tales of a TET Baby: The Journey Continues

Since Zane's surgery, whenever anyone would ask about my son's heart conditions this was my standard response "he had heart surgery at four months old and he will need a valve replacement at some point, BUT he won't need that until he's a teenager, so it's a long time from now." I'd fully brush off my future heart mom journey. It was so far in the future I never let myself even think about it. I never dared think about all of the logistics of having one child need major surgery while there were two other boys at home who would be missing their parents. I never thought about how having a brother undergoing surgery would affect the other two or how I would begin to explain the situation to his much younger baby brother. I never thought about dealing with missing school and having restrictions placed on Zane's activity after the surgery. Obviously I was aware that his pulmonary artery valve didn't function at all and that wasn't sustainable, but I also had held out hope that the valve replacement might be able to take place in cath lab not in another surgery.

Now we are seven years into this journey and recently I have felt a very distinct turn in the road. The odds of Zane making it into his teenage years without needing his valve replaced are very slim. This means the odds of being able to do it in cath lab instead of surgery are also very slim. He's a huge kid, which means his heart is working harder than the average seven year olds heart. This past years cardiology visit was the first one that involved any further testing and not just our normal "he's doing good, we don't see any changes, come back next year" report. That's when the road began to turn on our journey. Since January we've spent months waiting to get in for an MRI. I once again forgot about it and fell back into the hard denial that nothing was going to happen for a long time. Then the MRI was scheduled and I was faced with an actual date, a procedure that would need to be explained, the potential for things to go wrong, and the potential for the results to show something other than everything is fine, we don't have to do anything.

This summer he got his first chest x-ray, since he was an infant. He went back with the tech all by himself, not a big deal. As I sat in that waiting room I was all too aware of just how amazingly easy my heart mom journey has really been. I know lots of heart warriors have multiple different doctor's appointments every month, and have had countless hospitalizations in their life. We had gone so long with just his yearly cardiology appointment with nothing in between we had really gotten spoiled.

Today was MRI day. I had thoroughly prepped him over the past few days, trying to make perfectly clear what to expect and reinforce the importance not eating or drinking anything before the procedure. He was being fully sedated for the procedure since it was going to take two hours and he needed to be perfectly still for the entire time. Ninety nine percent of the time I'm not a big fan of my job. The one saving grace is that it affords me things like knowing nurses who work in the MRI department. It means that when we went to get his chest xray we went down and talked to a nurse in MRI (letting her borrow our Harry Potter supplies) so he could see the MRI area. It means the stresses of not knowing where we are going or getting lost in the hospital are taken away. It means my fears are eased about the whole procedure because I have worked in MRI and seen the entire process start to finish, I know there is very rarely complications and I know exactly what to expect so I can explain it all to him.

Needless to say we were all prepared for the big day and Zane was a rock star, as always. This morning we went to the bookstore before his procedure to get the last Captain Underpants book (and a few other fun things) as his reward for being such a trooper. He was pretty stressed about not being able to eat, and I might have put chairs in front of the fridge and pantry to make sure he didn't sneak any food, but overall he did amazing. As we headed to the hospital the skies began to cloud up. It had been perfectly sunny at our house, but the closer we got to the hospital the sky became gray, the clouds lowered in almost a fog, and it began to sprinkle. I began to tear up feeling the sky giving me a big dad bear hug. I felt dad surrounding me with his love and present. Just about the time I was going to loose it I look back in the mirror and Zane's wiping tears from his eyes, "I miss Grandpa." We both definitely felt his love with us today and we tried to embrace that gift without melting into a puddle of tears.

We pulled ourselves together before heading inside. Zane was a rock star with the entire process. He was calm, cool, and collected. He was happy to see his Harry Potter friend (my nurse friend), he talked to everyone, and he walked into the scanner with the nurse without even looking back at us. He is beyond brave and never ceases to amaze me.

Here he is, my seven year old brave kid, who could really use a hair cut!

 Big hugs for mom and dad before he headed off.

 Zach and I had a solid two hours to get lunch and hang out. Zach checked out all our new Captain Underpants paraphernalia while we waited. A friend of mine who was working came and ate lunch with us as well. 

 Then we went and picked up our drunk boy. He was pretty woozy, but really wanted to walk. We gave it a shot, but eventually there was too much stumbling so daddy carried him the rest of the way to the car, all eighty pounds of him. This is the main reason Zach needed to come to the MRI. We aren't getting results, it is in no way traumatizing really, but there would have been no way for me to get him in my car.

 Now we are home. He's enjoying the white mac and cheese that I had promised him. He has not thrown up, but I am keeping the emesis bag near by just in case. We're relaxing and snoozing on the couch, trying to get all the anesthesia out of his system so he can go to information night at school this evening.

 

 

As far as results go there really isn't anything to report if I were guessing. We don't see cardiology until February and I wouldn't be surprised if we don't hear anything about the MRI until that appointment. Best case they say that they got a good baseline measurement but there is nothing to do at this point. The far end, worst case scenario, which I think is highly unlikely, is that they read it and think he needs a repair soon. We shall see, so I continue on my heart mom journey would hurdle at a time. Thanks for all your prayers and well wishes. 



Deep Questions From the Backseat

There are the big questions in life that as a parent you know you're children will ask you eventually. The big stuff like what is heaven, who is God, how did Jesus die, why are we here, or where do babies come from. The ones that as a grown up you might not fully understand, let alone be able to explain them on a grade school level. As a mother of rather young children I felt like I had quite a bit of time to ponder these and work up appropriate answers. Well that is until about a year or so ago when the really deep questions in life started being hurled at me from the backseat of my car.

Sometime during Zane's final year home before school, the conversations the boys and I would have in the car got taken to the next level. Not necessarily on long road trips either. On short trips to the park or the grocery store heavy questions like "Who is God?" started coming my way, generally out of no where. I think I wrote about the day Zane asked me, "what would have happened if I hadn't had heart surgery?" That was one of the first, very deep questions he threw my way.


A lot of time the heavy conversations emerge from questions about Grandpa. We talk about Grandpa a lot and the boys know Grandpa died and that now he's in heaven with Jesus/God/people he loves. But they have lots of questions (don't we all) about the how's and why's of Grandpa's death. How did he die? Why did he die? Why did he die when he wasn't old? How do you not have a Dad but Grandma still has a dad? All the questions that have filled my soul for almost seven years and all of which really have no answers.






But as we all know children don't take, "just because" or "I don't know" for an answer well. They think we have answers to everything. So why wouldn't I know WHY my father died at sixty one verses my Grandfather who is alive and well at ninety one? So we delve into deep philosophical answers. For everything there is a season, everyone dies, Jesus needed Grandpa in heaven, it was his time to go, ect ect. All these answers are usually met with yet another why and eventually me nicely asking if we could please change the subject. For as often as they want to delve deep into the how's and why's of my father's untimely death, they just as frequently nonchalantly talk about it with tough blows like, "mom you can't play baseball with your dad because he's dead." Or my favorite, "well I miss him, but he's dead."








One of the other questions that I did not see coming AT ALL, was the day that, out of nowhere, Zane asked me, "Mom, what happened to all the Indians?" Oh son, where to begin. This question was posed when we were down by the shop so I had a solid thirty minutes to be grilled on Native American history, relocation, and the eventual death of most of the Native Americans. This question being posed by the Great Great Grandson of a man who ran in the land run, makes it all that more complicated. Not just good guys and bad guys stealing their land. There were lots of questions about who took their land, why, how, where do they live now, where are the teepees now, what happened to the buffalo. You name it, nothing easy to explain to a six and three year old.






More recently we had a deep, five minute conversation, about organ donation, how it works, who can give their organs, why people need organs, and Zane asked if he would be getting a new heart earlier this year. This stemmed from our friend Thomas, who they know get a new kidney, but had never really understand where the kidney came from. I guess Zane thought he would need a completely new heart at some time. I am not sure he was relieved or disappointed to learn his heart would just be repaired again and that he would not be getting a whole new one.






Rowan has been getting in on the questioning as of late as well. One day a few months ago, when it was just him and I in the car, he asked me "how does the sun move?" Which led to a long conversation about the sun being a star, that doesn't actually move. That we are a big planet, that is circling the sun, mind blowing knowledge for a four year old. That night Zach really amazed them both when he dropped the bomb on them that the moon was orbiting the earth, which was orbiting the sun. This all seems to have stuck with them though, because Rowan frequently tells me "the sun is moving and we are not." He got to put all his astrology knowledge to great use during the eclipse Monday.




The most recent deep question, and one I had to completely shut down, was "Who was Adolf Hitler?" This didn't come out of no where. We were talking about people who had fought in wars. I had explained that Papa worked on machinery during the Vietnam war. Then he asked if my Grandpa had been in a war, which lead to me saying yes he had been in World War II. You see where this is going. "What was WWII?" "Everyone in the world was fighting to try to stop a bad guy." "Who was the bad guy?" "Adolf Hitler," "Who was Adolf Hitler" and then I had to shut the conversation down, before I found myself trying to explain concentration camps to my children.


I love how their little minds work and love that they are so inquisitive, but do they keep me on my toes. There is no way to prepare for these conversation because they seem to come completely out of left field. I try to go with my gut reaction and pray I don't traumatize their poor little souls. My mother always told me boys speak to you the most and the best in the dark. I think that can hold true for the car in my family as well, they can't see my face which helps hide my initial reaction to their crazy questions. I can't wait to see what gets thrown at me next.

Solar Eclipse 2017

We had debated going to Missouri to the path of totality (is everyone sick of that term yet), but since it fell on a Monday and Zane just started school we decided eighty seven percent totality would just have to do. I shelled out thirty bucks so Rowan and I could have glasses at home and lucky for us Grandma and baby Alice were also at our house for the fun.


Rowan and Grandma went to get pie crust making supplies in the morning so we started our day making pie crust for the Spice Shop's Pie Day next month. I was on baby duty, pretending to be a twin mom for the day with baby T and baby Alice. Rowan has helped with pie day prep for a few years now so he knows what's he's doing and got right to work.

 This grin is too much for me!



My phone alarm went off at 11:37am when the eclipse was supposed to be starting here. We made a handy dandy craft so Rowan could show us what the sun looked like every time we out and checked on it. We went out frequently to see how things were progressing.

 Here's Baby T in some eclipse shades. He never even made it outside during all the fun, he slept right through it, enjoying his slightly darker room yesterday.

 Here are Ro and I in our fun eclipse glasses. Fun fact about pictures in these glasses, you can't tell when they are done taking your picture because you're effectively blind. Mom just let Ro and I smile.

Ro and I went and checked a few times from various locations and we checked on all the fun shadows as well, which was just as much fun.

 Our peak time here was 1:05pm, apparently 13% sunlight still looks like a normal day of sun, but it was fascinating to see. Rowan thought that there would be a time when it got completely dark and had a hard time understanding that that wasn't going to be the case where we lived. So he headed off to naps slightly disappointed, but I think overall he had a great time checking out the sun. Here's baby Alice and I at peak eclipse time. No she did not look at the sun, but did enjoy the temperature drop with the nice cool breeze that came with it.



 Zane went outside and school and was provided with glasses. I saw later, on social media, that a lot of parents went and watched it with their kiddos, oops I did not. He didn't seem too terribly impressed by the whole thing. Maybe in 2024 we'll drive to the path of totality and see the glowing ring and experience the darkness in the middle of the day. Everyone will be old enough to enjoy it and remember it then. B