Adeline's Tea Party

Monday was my  niece Adeline's 4th birthday and this past Saturday she had a good old fashion tea party to celebrate. Saturday, while the kids were napping, Amy, Trina, and I prepared the food, tea, and decorations for the event. By the end of nap time we had transformed the kids playroom into a beautiful tea room and we had transformed into ever so classy ladies. Amy had on a mink fur wrap and fur hat, which I'm pretty sure traumatized my little one year old nephew for life, who thought she had dead dogs around her neck. She also had on brown gloves and all sorts of fun jewels.

I had bought a boa and brought my Grandmother's ruby ring for the event, but after seeing Trina and Amy's outfits I realized I needed to step up the classyness. I borrowed one of Adeline's hats, some of her dress up jewels, and after raiding Trina's closet and jewelry box I think I managed to look pretty fancy, even in my boring blue sweater and khakis.



When Adeline woke up from her nap it was time to get her fancy for the event. She dawned her Fancy Nancy dress, boa, and shoes, though she couldn't walk in the shoes and the boa was "itchy" so they were really only worn for the pictures. I took pictures of her getting ready, not unlike her wedding day, but here is the end result, complete with her very own tiara.

At three the little princesses began to show up, dressed to the nines. There were only 4 other girls besides Adeline which was just about the perfect number. They decorated crowns and magic wands with stickers before the actual tea party began. The menu consisted of cupcakes, petite fours, chocolate chip cookies, M&Ms, peanuts, and of course real hot tea. The little girls really weren't that interested in the food, but loved their tea with plenty of sugar and cream, which they could stir with their very own tiny spoons. So adorable! The girls drank their tea very carefully out of their glass tea cups and most of them asked for more.

As a "grown up" at the event I served tea, passed the sugar and cream to the girls, passed out cupcakes ( that didn't get eaten), took pictures, and thoroughly enjoyed watching the little girls, all dressed up, enjoying their tea party. There was gift time and a little bit of play time after the tea and then the party was over. A great time was had by all. After a tough week this was just the happy thought that I needed, topped of with Adeline telling me I was the best Aunt in the world and that our gift was her favorite, you can't beat that! It made me want to have a girl, not any time soon, but at some point. I can't wait for the next tea party!

Ten on Tuesday

I'm home sick today, feeling crummy, so my brain isn't working very well, but here goes.

1. I woke up feeling kind of sick yesterday but powered forward with my new way of dealing with feeling sick which is ignore it because I cannot afford ( literally because I have no ETO at work so I'm not getting paid today) to be sick. This method worked briefly but by the time I was home from my training class at work I was feeling very crummy and by the time the National Championship started I was achy, my throat hurt horribly, and I was officially sick :(

2. I had planned to blog about the amazing tea party I attended over the weekend yesterday but my brain wasn't working so I couldn't do it justice. But stay tuned for some adorable tea party pictures once I am feeling better.

3. It snowed a lot yesterday/last night. Maybe eating some fresh snow will make me feel better. Zach tells me it is perfect snow man snow which means it is probably delicious.

4. I got to pick Zane up from day care again yesterday and I am so glad that both times I have picked him up he has been having a blast and been so happy. He seems to really love his day care ladies and they of course adore him.

5. I hate that I can't get extreme due to feeling aweful. I was just starting to get in a bit of a working out routine and after this weekend of eating my weight in cupcakes at the tea party and now being sick I'm completely out of sync. I will have to get back on the horse when I'm feeling better, which will be right about the time we are heading back to Oklahoma for Brendan's bday!

6. Today has been really lonely here without Zane. I don't know what I did on my days off at home without him. I have slept all day today, in hopes of feeling better, it hasn't really worked and I have missed Zane terribly.

7. I miss reading. Ever since Dad died I can't concentrate long enough to read. I have two books on my night stand that I really want to read but every time I try to start them I get about 5 pages in and realize that I don't remember anything that I have read because my brain/thoughts are some where else. I keep trying, so hopefully I will be able to read again soon.

8. Zane has really started to enjoy sitting up on his changing table. He really would love to use the hand sanitizer and thoroughly enjoys looking through/playing with all the stuff ( mainly medicine, lotion, powder, ect) that are kept in a basket at the end of the table. Here he is, very focused on the task at hand.

9. Zach and I got a new knife for Christmas and I am pretty sure it is too sharp to be safe. Zach has cut himself both times he has used it. I have yet to use it, but am slightly scared now. Time to go over knife safety.

10. I am getting very nervous about the upcoming plane ride with Zane. I know we flew with him once before but he was 2 months old and slept all the time. Now he is awake and needs to be entertained. Hopefully he doesn't scream the whole time. Wish us luck.

Where would I be without Zane

Well let me answer that question really quickly... I would still be crying on my couch if not for Zane. As it is I am playing with teething toys and rattles on the floor.

Lets go back. A few years ago one of Abbey's friends was in a master's degree class and recorded an oral history of dad's life. This consisted of dad talking about his life, farming, the land run, ect. I vaguely remember this happening but hadn't thought anything of it until Abbey gave us a copy of the CD for Christmas. I found the CD today while unpacking from Christmas and repacking for our upcoming trip to Zach's parents this weekend. I thought it might be comforting to hear dad's voice, though I knew there was the possibility of it being epically depressing.

Turns out it was the later of those two things. I got maybe 2 minutes in before bursting into tears. Zane was taking a nap so I continued to listen/cry for a few minutes, but it did not get any better. I quickly turned it off and fell into a dark place, missing my father horribly. I feel like I should be able to pick up the phone and hear his voice at any time. I expect him to call me early some morning to just check in on me. I cannot believe that isn't going to happen again.

I had to quickly pull myself together, as I heard Zane muttering in his crib. Before going to get Zane I quickly let Abbey and Able know what a horrible idea listening to the CD had been and that they should not listen to it, under any circumstance, at least not yet. I know that at some point the CD will mean the world and years from now it will be a great blessing to have a recording of his voice, but for now it is just to soon.

I am so grateful that I have such a happy baby boy to pull me out of my dark place. I may have a heavy heart, but I have a smile on my face thanks to my happy thought, Zane.

Ten on Tuesday

1. We finally gave in and bought Zane new car seats. He is one pound away from being too heavy for his baby car seat and is already too tall for it, his poor little feet hang over the end. Yesterday when we got home from running errands there were four big boxes on my porch, two new Britax car seats, diapers, and wipes. I thought we would surely be set for a while until I realized today it is time to order more formula. It never ends.  Here is a picture showing just how ready Zane is for a new, bigger, car seat.

2. I am getting really excited about my niece's tea party this weekend. She will be turning four years old and she requested "something beautiful" for her birthday. I'm not sure that I managed that, but I tried.

3. Brendan turns four years old ten days after Adeline and I have no clue what to get him. If anyone has ideas of what to get a four year old boy that has everything let me know.

4. I am back on the workout wagon. Zach and I are doing P90X, the X stands for extreme, and I find it pretty fun. I like that Zach and I can do it together and there is a different work out everyday. We have done it twice so far and I am extremely sore. I had planned on doing it when I got home from work today but my 14 hour work day was pretty extreme so we opted not to do it tonight. I'm trying to eat better as well, hopefully I can start losing some of the weight accrued from last year.

5. Zane is loving his sippy cup. He can control it, but if left to his own devices he would really love to just put it in and out of his mouth for hours at a time. I had to go to Target and get a back up yesterday.

6. Dad was in my dream Sunday night. He has been in a few dreams over the past couple months, but he never talked to me until Sunday night's dream. He asked how Able was doing and for some reason I told him Able had decided to play baseball. It was great to see him, even in a dream. Maybe he will ask about me next time.

7. I am behind on Zane's scrapbook and it is starting to stress me out. I need to just sit down and do some of it, but there are so many cute pictures, how do I decide? Also, when do I find the free time to do that with the kid and what not.

8. Zach is working on building storage under our stairs. It is going to be awesome when it is done. I think he said there is going to be 11 cubbies that will fit big canvas storage bins for Zane's toys, books, blankets, and all the fun stuff that he will be getting in the future. I love what a handy husband I have!!

9. I'm excited that Able is doing so well at his new job in OK. He sells insurance of all kinds, so if anyone in Oklahoma needs some life, car, house, disability, or any other kind of insurance let me know and I can hook you up with quite the sales man. I need to buy some more life insurance while I'm home in a couple weeks myself.

10. How about those Sooners finally pulling off a BCS victory in the Fiesta Bowl. I was sure thaty they were going to figure out a way to loose that game, but they pulled it out and ended the 5 year BSC game loosing streak. Very exciting, BOOMER, SOONER!!!!

Little Zaney Boy

Brendan called Zane little Zaney boy while we were home, because that is what my mom calls him sometimes, it was priceless. That's just a fun side note, I really just wanted to do a quick update on some of Zane's new tricks/interests. For some reason I feel like there has been quite a few changes over the past week or two so I wanted to jot them down

First of all he has a new face that is absolutely hysterical. I think he might have learned it from Maggie, as it vaguely resembles Maggie's "Cheese" face. He scrunches up his nose and eyes and sticks his little lips out, sometimes this includes him saying "mmmm." This face is used to express all emotions, joy, sadness, I want more food, I'm done with food, I want my binki, I don't want my binki, really anything. I tried to capture a picture of the face while he ate lunch yesterday but failed. I will post a picture as soon as I manage to capture it!

Another new adorable habit Zane has is when he eats ( a bottle, a sippy cup, or real food) he likes to play with his hair and pat his little head. I know, not ground breaking but so cute, unless this is happening while he is eating real food and then it becomes a hot mess, but still cute! He is rolling over much more now. He was off rolling for quite a while after surgery, but he now rolls to his back anytime he is put on his belly. He is still not rolling from his back to his belly like he did before surgery, but he does it occasionally. We are working on learning to crawl but not making much progress as of yet!

Zane has now moved to the phase where he knows Zach and I exist and misses us/freaks out when we leave the room. This is wonderful, but can also be frustrating. Now when I run downstairs to change over the laundry, while he is playing in his saucer, he starts to cry immediately and when I get back upstairs he is pathetically standing in his saucers with his little hands up. Also, now when I get home from work, if he wakes up and I try to 'quickly' cuddle him back to sleep, he wakes up and realizes it is me. This leads to him getting really excited and wanting to play, which really isn't ideal at 8:30 or 9pm. All of this makes me feel really loved by my little man. He also loves sitting up on the couch playing with his toys, here is a picture of him maxing and relaxing. From this angle it looks like he has freakishly long legs, which is pretty cute.

His new favorite toys are Tad, the talking frog who sings and plays music. Aunt Abbey gave him this for Christmas and he thoroughly enjoys sitting up with Tad, listening to tunes, and of course trying to eat him. He also is thoroughly enjoying the star stacker that Aunt Trina got him for Christmas. He can get the stars off, which makes a great sound and makes lights come on as well. He does try to eat it, which doesn't really work, but he still likes to try. He has also really started to love playing peek a boo. We spend large quantities of time doing this each day, so much fun.

I could go on all day about how freaking adorable and wonderful my son is but I will stop with those few little updates!

Burning Regrets

As I mentioned in my New Years post, burning our regrets is a family tradition that started when I was in high school. The tradition began when we started having big bon fires on New Years Eve, so it was only natural to think about burning our regrets from the past year as we welcomed in the new one. Often Oklahoma is under a burn ban, due to it never raining there, so Mom and I sometimes had to resort to burning our regrets in a coffee can or metal bucket (whatever is handy) before running around the house with noise makers to welcome in the new year. As you can see in this picture our new years celebrations also include fun hats of any kind and fun nose accessories or glasses, you can't get more festive than that!

In the past my regrets were usually rather trivial, I can't think of anything of much importance that I have burned recently, except possibly burning the regret of going to college forever for no apparent reason. Last year I don't think I burned regrets, as I was in St. Louis, pregnant, and going to bed super early since I was working on New Years day.

This year I felt like I really had quite a few regrets with which I had been grappling with for a while. I thought burning them might just be the ticket to letting them go. After writing them all down, some huge and some trivial, I burned the paper in the fire place. It was surprisingly cathartic to have a tangible image of my regrets disappearing and I feel a bit of the weight has been lifted as I face a new year. I don't know that I will ever fully be able to let go of some of these regrets, but my goal is to learn a lesson from each regret, whether it is to be more compassionate, more patient, to be present in each moment, or to simply not take time, or people, for granted.  

New Years 2011

I had a highly uneventful New Years Eve/New Years day. I worked both days and had fairly busy work days so not a lot of energy for celebration. Last night when I came home from work I ate pretzels and drank ginger ale in honor of Dad's New Years Eve tradition. Growing up I really thought this was a world wide tradition, turns out Dad just liked pretzels and didn't drink, so ginger ale was as festive as he got. Zach had also bought us Champagne so we drank a toast to the new year in our Waterford chrystal champagne flouts from our wedding ( this is one of the two times a year we get them out, the second being our anniversary). I burned my regrets ( and I had a lot) in the fire place ( another family tradition I will elaborate on more in another post), and then thought I would easily cuddle my baby boy to sleep.

Little did I know that Zane has officially become a night owl. He woke up when I got home at 7:45ish and was awake when I had to go to bed at 10pm since I was going to have to work today. He was pretty chipper and playing until about 9:45 and then things went down hill quickly and an epic battle between Zane and Zach ensured. Zane has yet to realize that, spoiler alert, we will always win these battles. Tonight was more of the same with the battle lasting a slightly shorter time but was just as epic.

I am now watching the Sooners in the Fiesta Bowl. We are leading as I write this but I feel the choke is imminent. I have watched way too many Fiesta Bowls that we some how manage to loose. I have eaten my Tostitos, so I have done my part.