My People

I do not have a ton of close friends like my brother and sister do. Part of this is because I'm lazy and loose touch with people easily, I will admit it. Part of it is to do with the fact that I spent all of college either in the library or in Missouri visiting my boyfriend. But the few close friends I have are amazing and I wanted to send a shout out and a big thank you to "my people": Anna and Jess.

After I found out about my father passing away I called both of them as soon as I pulled myself together. They both were shocked, as we all were, but they put aside their sadness of losing a father figure and the sadness for my loss, and became my strength. Dad died on a Tuesday and both of them informed me they had taken off the rest of the week within an hour of hearing the news. They were ready to do whatever they needed to do to keep me standing.

The irony in this is that Dad had made Anna promise him, when we were in college, that she would be there for our family in "a time of need" (specifically when he died). This had been a running joke between all of us since then, because of course my father wasn't going to be dying for years ( his mother lived to be 94 for Pete's sake). As I called her to tell her the news that conversation with Dad years ago popped back into my mind, as if he knew all along this was going to happen at some point, sooner rather than later. Looking back there were a lot of conversations that make me think this.

Anna kept her promise and of course was joined by my long time best friend Jess. I don't know why initially I was so surprised at their willingness to drop everything for me and my family, those are the kind of people I surround myself with and really don't have the time or energy for the others. So they both showed up at the farm on Wed. At first I wasn't sure how much they would need to do. I knew they could watch the kids while we went to the funeral home, but past that I wasn't sure. They both decided they would stay all week and boy were they a blessing.

They watched all three kids while we went to plan the funeral, Friday night during the visitation, and all the time in between when the rest of us where struggling with a much slower reaction time. Truth be told they probably saved Maggie's life at some time during the week. We would see her eating something or trying to go outside and say no, but just couldn't muster the strength to run over and stop her. They also delivered happy thoughts (children) to whoever needed them at the time.

They cleaned our house (toilets included), kept the laundry going, got up early, stayed up late, slept on air mattresses, and had a constant eye on me making sure they were at the ready to over see any breakdowns that may be coming. They rubbed my feet and shoulders, gave me hugs at just the right time, and let us be alone with our thoughts when we needed it. They helped me get through the worst week of my life with grace.

My friend, Emily, who I have known since 5th grade, also was a great source of strength and support. However, Emily was one of the few people who when I saw I immediately burst into tears. This was because I know how much Dad loved her and thought of her as his own daughter. He had loved her since we were in 5th grade. Through all the bad friends I had in high school and junior high Emily remained the one person that Dad would always say he loved and would constantly be thanking her for being my friend. She came out to the farm to visit and our babies, who were born just two days apart, got to have a little play date which was a bright spot in the sadness. On the day of the funeral I could feel her love and prayers surrounding me even though it took me about half of the service to find her in the crowd. Her hugs made me burst into tears but also gave me so much strength. (She also gave me sunglasses for the cemetery which was key, thanks Em!)

As the week drew on every one's "people" showed up to help and provide comfort. Abbey had two people there for her doing all the same things, Mom's "person" flew in from Arizona, Able's "people" were present and comforting to him. My Aunt Ann's "person" from OKC even came up for her though I'm not sure she had even ever met dad. They were all great blessings and a great comfort to us all. So I just want to say a big thank you and I love you to "my people." I could literally not have made it through the week without you.