Back to School

Last Wednesday was the first day of school for the boys. They went on Wednesday and then were home the rest of the week. It was a strange day to say the least. Zane is being driven to school by Rowan's first grade teacher, who lives in our neighborhood and now teaches fourth grade. His school starts at seven thirty in the morning so he was up early and gone by seven. This meant that Rowan, Thatcher, and I had almost two hours to hang around the house before taking Rowan to school. One of our compromises with letting the kids go back to in person school was that we would try to not have them ride the bus which means I'm doing car line drop off and pick up for the first time since Zane started school.

Here I am at six thirty in the morning, covered in boys, terrified to send these kids out into this crazy world, questioning all the decision.

First day of Fourth Grade, in the middle of a global pandemic, in a brand new school. Just a normal first day.

So we have a plethora of masks that we've bought from various places which means every morning the boys get to pick a mask to wear and then pack at least two backups in case their mask gets wet, lost, or they just get bored with it. I don't know. They have lanyards of different colors that they get to choose from as well, which helps them not have to keep track of them when they take them off. It's a weird world, but they have enjoyed having masks for different moods. I assume we will lose a lot along the way. When they get home the mask and their clothes all go in the wash when they walk in the door.

Here is Rowan, two hours before it was time to leave for second grade. He was much more nervous than his brother, which goes without saying. He opted for the pizza mask for day one.

See these eyes, these are his sad, scared, brave eyes. Rowan had a brave face on all morning, right up until we were in the car line waiting for drop off, that's when he fell apart. "I miss Zane. I can't do this without Zane mom. He knows everyone. He's friends with everyone. I don't know anyone. I'm not friends with anyone." I had a quick five minutes to try to reassure him that he did not have to be Zane. He didn't have to know everyone, he didn't have to be friends with everyone. He didn't have to chat up every teacher and have everyone know his name. He could just have a few friends and just know the teachers whose class he was in. He didn't in fact have to be Zane he could just be himself and he was awesome and brave and would do amazing.

After we got Rowan off to school T and I went to get donuts, a yearly first day of school tradition for us. T was sad that his brothers were gone but got over it quickly.

Zane's teacher sent me this picture mid day which I wasn't sure was a great sign. He doesn't look too thrilled, but he claimed to have a good first day.

After T's finger injury he forgot how to hold a pen so we've been working on relearning this skill while we work on learning our letters and numbers. That little finger doesn't like to bend to much, but it's been getting better over the last few weeks.

The teacher that is going to be bringing Zane home most days had to stay late on the first day of school so I had to go brave the car line on the first day of school. It was complete and utter insanity. I got there at the time school was supposedly being let out. The line didn't begin moving for twenty minutes, then it was another twenty or thirty minutes till I actually had Zane in my car. The car line at the new school has a round about built into it. If I had to do this every day I would legit lose my mind and eventually just cave and put him on the bus, germs be damned.

After the round about I finally made it to the front of the school. As I pulled up there was a see of fourth and fifth grade children, arms length apart, masks on, in a hundred degree heat. It looked like a scene from a post apocalyptic movie. I burst into tears at the reality life that our poor children are having to live through. How can this be real life? 

Zane's school got out at two twenty and we were on the road by three fifteen and headed to Rowan's school to get him. I spent hours in the car line that day. Things have gotten better, but day one was rough.

Here is Rowan after his first day of school. He was drained. He had a good day and was happy to see his friend, but it was just a lot to deal with. 

Usually the first day of school is all excitement and then the following day you get up and do it again trying to fall into some sort of routine. Wednesday night I found myself planning the next day, what time to leave, how to make things go smoother, only to remember that they weren't going back to school until Monday. It was a very strange, anticlimactic feeling having just one day at school followed by being back at home. 

Thursday and Friday of last week were technically virtual school days but neither boy really had any assignments beyond trying to figure out how to use the website that virtual learning would be taking place on. They had some videos to watch but that was all. For a month we'd been working towards August 19th, the first day of school. School starting was this magical date we just had to make it to then things would seem normal again. Then we made it to that day and nothing really changed. We were still home, bored, trying to find things to do. It was just more of the same and everyone was very frustrated.

Zane's working on typing skills since most of his work will need to be typed and turned.

Rowan did have an art assignment to make a creation that represented art to him. This was his creation and he even put on his Mizzou jersey for his Mizzou Alumni art teacher who he so dearly misses.

We once again came to blows over technology at the end of the week leading to another technology detox. I don't know why we can't find a happy medium where we can watch some technology without it being the soul focus of everyone's life, but it just doesn't seem to work that way. So over the weekend we were technology free and that's when the most creative, most fun, most unique things seems to happen. Last weekends project was a robotic bug track. Mom had ordered us replacement robotic bugs for the Bugs in the Kitchen game. They came as a pack of five, perfect for racing. Zach, being Zach, designed an intricate, complex bug track, complete with ramps, tunnels, and spots for a crowds. Zane added sponsors from whatever food we happened to have in the pantry, most of which isn't brandname.

Yep, there is a baseball game taking place in the middle of the track.

It was loads of fun and we've raced bugs everyday since. Who would have thunk it?

I worked and Zach managed the in person school drop off and pick ups. When I texted to see how things went Zach said they both had a good day and said everything was fine. When I got home at eight o'clock a flood of feelings and emotions came flooding at me from all the children. Rowan feel into a puddle of tears about all sorts of random things, ending in he missed Zane and he was sad that he couldn't go to school five days a week. It took us a while to get to that point. First he had to go through every sadness that he'd witnessed from any and all his classmates. The poor child feels all the things, of all the people, so very deeply. That's currently a lot to handle. It took a solid hour to get everyone's hug sacks full and all their feelings sorted out so we could go to bed. The managing the emotions alone is a full time, exhausting job, to say nothing for all the at home schooling things we have to manage now as well. 

Tuesday I home with T while the boys went to school. Nap time when they are at school feels purely magical. I have tried to nap both days I've been home and they've been at school, but can't fall asleep because I'm just too excited for the silence. Tuesday I went through pictures in full silence. Silence and stillness is what I miss the most. The calm of those two hours, alone, in my house has to fill me up for the rest of the week of craziness. I will never take this time for granted again. It's a pure joy to have days with just T and it's unbelievable to have two hours of silence. 

Batman and I braving the car line. Also I randomly where bandannas like this now because there are no rules and it keeps my hair out of my face.

Wednesday was our first real attempt at a virtual school day at home, with a set schedule we had agreed upon over the weekend. As per our routine we had planned to start with our normal exercise time. We had a bike ride planned but Zane immediately rode his bike into a trash can, just like in all the comedy movies. It was hysterical, but he was legitimately hurt. He was bleeding from his hands and legs and had this giant bruise, so exercise time was cancelled. The day went down hill from there. 

There were a lot of technical issues, there were a lot of